Juli 08, 2017


We humans are talkative. Our job is talking, no matter in which form. Social media, telephone calls, the old schooled letter or only a conversation person to person. We are talking the whole day.

When you are study the conversations, you'll hear a lot of different voices, threads and mime facettes. Amazing how the humans act when the like someone or not.
The boy next to me is talking with me anteverted in my direction. Searching for the eyes of my dialog partner and listen carefully and concentrated. When he's talking with that enthusiasm, you have to look up to him. He's talking about thing's I don't understand, difficult computer problems and how you can tackle it with computer languages like C#, pearl or only java. I've learnd a bit C# but that's a minimum of his knowledge. Nevertheless, I like listening the beautiful chesty voice. Every time I am listening my brian mechanism is working at high level. Following the conversation and the process in brain networking takes its time. I think I've learnt a lot from him about the computer usage, even more than in information technology lessons. I like him.
Yesterday I talked with a friend who harmed me a while ago. She was polite and told me that in her life were a few changes in the last months. We talked for the first time after one year no "hello". Annotating we've seen each other every day. It was ok, I've closed this chapter of my life half a year ago. When she excused herself what happened in the past, I looked in her eyes. Eyes show you what words will never emote. Within the conversation I saw, that she experienced how it is when you stand from one to the other day outside your door with no humans you call friends. I hadn't pity, I experienced that either. For my personal maybe it was the best. The second thing is that second face, in front the nice person but divious. I act likable, but with critic thoughts. I would like to see every person in a positive way but eyes never lies.

Two conversation. I always have the senitment that I don't find the right words in situations. We can see which conversation it is and wich sympatic they have for each other.

When we be accurate, we have a conversation either at the moment. Ok, maybe no conversation more a monolouge in written words. Have a nice weekend. Does you experienced conversations like I discribed?

März 27, 2017

Runway of time

You want to change things in your life. Every day the new chance to do exactly this. Tip the reset button and 24 hours full of opportunities to take the problem dealing. Instead of your popurses you fell down into old behaviour pattern for running out of time. The thing is that we always say we want to do that and change this but most of this capabilities we don't take. You may are tiered and that's the reason for you won't do sports. That are all pleas.
Every day I have plenty of pleas for not doing anything. Sometimes I would really love photograph something but there is the school. I have to learn maths or physics, nevertheless I'm not doing that because motivation is under the ground. I'm tired and have to sleep first. The take a photo has been forgotten because the other things. In the end I'm sleeping the day and the time runs away in daydreams.
It's like you are  caught in a rainbow bubble. The world outside is different and have hunderts of changes in one minute. Nevertheless inside of this bubble everything is silent and you're a paralysed alone human. It's the reason for you can't blow that bubble. However when your ambition is strong enough the chance to change your own paralysed situation is possible.
Take the decision with accept the NOW like it is could be difficult. In lieu you crave in old memories. Exactly that they are and not more. When we always thinking about the past and what we'll do in our future, now will be forgotten one day. We live in the moment and we only have this one, every second a new starts. I know how hart it is archieving everything you want at one day and trying have one great day. Of course we can't overcome the destinity and the history, that made us, but the question what we can archieve at this day we handle.
The post is called runway of time because every second, minute and hour is valuable and often we are only a observer instead of an actor who takes the opportunity for moving.
Can I quote myself? If yes, the following lines will noodle over the time issue.

You always waiting for this perfect moment. 
What is when I say this one is at the moment?

März 09, 2017

Drawback of being left-handed

The today's society is right-handed. However some people are left-handed, they are a minority. Statistics say that only around 10 per cent of the population rather do things with left than with right.
I'm left-handed and a girl. It sound weird but I only know other left-hander, they are male. So my question: Is there anybody behind the screen which is one either?
Sometimes I feel like an interloper. This world is for right-hander. Actually I'm proud to be part of a minority, the left-handers. Nevertheless I have problems with standarts, the majority won't understand.

1. Drive a car in Germany. Since it isn't a left-hand friendly. Here is legal dealings. That says gear change is right. I have had my driver licence since August and admittadly my right hand confound the gears. Furthermore the hand break is right, every time I need my left hand supporting thight it. I think with left-handed traffic it would be a lot easier for me to drive a car.

2. I would like to by a camera. Nevertheless I'm not able to have the right eye open and the left closed. It's changed. Left open and right closed, I tried to learn the other option but failed. So that is the problem. In normal you hold cameras with right and look in with the right eye. I searched, there is no camera which you can hold with left! Bad Luck, for me. In the Internet it says we have no need for such cameras and the development costs are to high. Seriously? Right hander, you only have to mirror the things. Is it so difficult? You won't have more developement costs than with normal cameras.

3. Another Drawback is when you are in school. Some examples, every left-hander knows.

Drawing or writing with left could be smeared and your hand is colored.

The spiral bound is always left. You can't write than.

You always have to bring your own things. Especially siccors.

4. When you are anywhere where you have to sign something. Often the biro is fixed right on a twine and it's absolutely annoying when the twine is short for writing with that ballpointer with your left hand.

5. In times where smartphones are used every day we could think it doesn't matter with wich hand you apply it. That's wrong. A lot of phones have their grit on the left side, so when you use it with left the rate isn't that high than with right. Maybe one or another knows the onehand keyboard. I'm not allowed to use that. My phone have one only for right-handed People.

My one hand keyboard.

Do you know these problems, when you are a left-hander, either? I'm sure there are a lot more aspects which are differ the handness and have their drawback. Hope you enjoyed the persecution of a left-hander.

Februar 13, 2017


Hurt and Love

The time isn't easy
wild argues 
about ego.
A lonly house, 
my brother and mother desert US. 
My dad and sister 
looking silent. 


Heart, Family and Brain


Anywhere is this boy, 
a friend, 
afraid of being honest
I'm crushed. 

complicated situation

We are friends
I LOVE him

his eyes, lips and character

are a bomb
wide range of colours

happy, love, sad, impressed, 

can't order it

1000 in one brain, 
one moment, 
Love and Hurt combined. 

At the moment this is my situation, I won't talk with hunderts of letters about this trouble in my life. Maybe I was able to express my feelings with you with that poem and you track why I have taken the time until I wanted to share this with you. I needed time for talking, thinking and reacting with the big change. 
I know I'm not a poet with a lot of poetry and rhymes, nevertheless I learned that the poetry let us share things in a different way and we can interpret in words that a lot. Furthermore every person would handle different and the transdission from this feelings are different. As you know I'm always open for advice. 

Januar 25, 2017

Mountain`s top


Last weekend I was in the Alpes and today I'll share all these moments with you.
Maybe you know that I'm a total amateur with the snowboard and it need a lot of practice until I'll drive like I want.
Therfore I decided to take the chair lift after having paid my ski pass. It have taken its time until the finish. At the finish line I have been relaxed because in another ski - area I'd already had a lot of practise with it. Nevertheless I didn't recodnice that I had to alight and than suddenly the ground was lower than one meter before. The result was that I was falling out the chair lift and had tried to be an acrobat so that the chair wouldn't hit my head.
Subsequently somebody told me this piste was a black one. For a beginner the best (not).
Another memorie I had at the button lift. It's really difficult for a beginner to go by them on top. Especially for a snowboard beginner. It needed around one hour to go on the top, because I plunged frequently out of it. Sometimes I had to walk down or ride down when the piste is beside the button lift.

If anybody read this and had experienced a simular situation with a lift , please write a comment. 

Furthermore I was at the mountain's top. The feeling to be the hero over the landscape was amazing and the view either. When I was sitting there beside the summit cross, I had plenty of time to order my thoughts. Thinking about the past, the present and what will happen in the future reminded me that the landscape is a part of our lives.

The moment when you are at mountains top 
and have a fantastic view. 
It's like the alpes represent your life 
with deeps and tops. 
In the distance something special,
 nobody knows what will happen 
and in front of you one challenge.

I think that little text could be a nice quote for this special moment in the alpes. I invented that while I was sitting there on the mountains top with its descent to vale as challenge for this moment.

Januar 15, 2017

Every point counts!

I've finished my first semester out of 4 senior semesters. I read that in the USA students from the 12th grade are called seniors but it's there the last grade before college or university. Here in Germany it's a little bit different, we have grammar schools (here called Gymnasium) they takes until grade 12 and 13. There is a big differencial between the single schools.Do you want to know more about the education system in Germany?

I already told you that I'm going to a vocational grammar school and why I've choose that school. Click here and read more about it.

Last year I was in year 11 and today's year 12 but my higher education entrance qualification will be in year 13. It's the graduation here in Germany which that you are able to study at University or college. Nevertheless I like to call these two years 12 and 13 senior year, because they are important for my graduation.

Last year we've got marks between the numbers 1 and 6. One was the best and six the worth. This year the grading changed a lot. In every test you are writing you can reach 15 points if you are good enough. The skale is between 0 and 15, the more points the merrior.

Hence the points will be count for every single subject and divided by the number of test. The result is than your subject points in this semester. However sometimes your points you reached in a test can change your whole points a lot.
I was really good in sports until the last performance where I only reached 5 points, so sports fall down to 9 points although I've had another performance with 15 points.

All your points from every semester will be count. That will be one part of your graduation grade. You can reach in every semester 150 points, so all in all for this part 600 points. The other 300 points you can reach with writing 5 exams.
It's really importat to reach points because one point can decide about everything. One point less than 5 means that you failed when you have more fails than liced, you won't have the graduation.

In this semester I reached 87 points out of 150 and admintally I'm not pleased with that result. Hopefully I'll learn the next semester more than now.
Do you also have your grading in points and are you pleased with the semester result?

Januar 05, 2017

Hello 2017!

 How could I start my first post in the year 2017? I mean I have been ill since 31st December 2016, so my start into 2017 wasn't that a dream. Today I'm better and decided to write a little bit about my goals and wishes for 2017. 

2016 is in the past but the memories we undergoed influence our present, today the 4th January 2017 and the future. Everything will be one time in the past, tomorrow the present day will be history. 
Like Budda said: 
Do not dwell in the past, 
do not dream ofthe future, 
concentrate the mind
on the present moment.
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/b/buddha101052.html?src=t_past
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/past.html
Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate the mind on the present moment.
Read more at: https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/keywords/past.html

He has been absolutely right, we can only archieve something when we do it and we are capable to do it in the present. Think about this quote, in my mind it's really wise.

I've reading the goals I wanted to archieve in the year 2016. Admintally they were me, nevertheless I couldn't do every. The most I also want to do this year as well, but I'll list there here either.

1. Save money. One year ago my main problem was that I've spent to much money on unless things and have them twice, this payment behaviour I improved the last year. Every months there were a little sum which I could save. So I've got around 500 euros available for spending into point 2. 

2. Remodel my room. I have this furniture since I can think. My parents say they bought this room when I was around two years old. In my opinion it's time for something new.
The monentary I've already spared wouldn't be enough for reform there everything but it's a good inception. Furthermore to save money furniture could also be bought in a second hand shop or on several internet platforms where humans sell things they need no longer. There I'll buy a study desk. 

3. The more structure project is still working in my life. It's working better than in 2015 but not by a long shot structured.

4. Participate in a marathon. That's such a silly goal, because for years I want it but the motivation to go jogging wasn't that big. Nevertheless in september I started running because of points for sports performance. Before training it was horrible and afterwards fantastic. My motivation is here, one light after a dark tunnel. So I hope this goal will be archieved this year. Wish me lots of luck.  

5. Have fun by trying new things. I love to try things, food or sports. This year I would like to improve my snowboard skills  ( I could be a perfect person for a comedy show in that case). Furthermore my aim of tries is about a billiard play, drive a wakeboard, make something out of wood and the list is a lot more longer.

6. Learn in school. Every year the same goal. In the end I hope I'm not the only one who will never archieve this goal like this human wanted. So it's one more time a point for this archievement list. 

7. Have an amazing project paper. This year I'm able to write one about the history of the University in my hometown. It's pretty interesting but hard work, of course. The best thing is that which that I could cancel one exam for next year's graduation. That's the reason for why it is necessary to have a high points range. 

8. This point is about blogging. There are a few things I would like to reach. One thing out of these is something where you can help me: my dream is it to reach 3500 pageviewes at all in my whole blog history. The second point is that I'll try to be more professional, so that increase regular posts and interesting themes. If you have ideas I can do better, please write that to me. Every feedback is welcome. 

9. Read books. I'll make a list with all books I'll read  2017. I think the list would be as long as toilet paper, so that there will be another post with the listed books. Have you books you can suggest to me? 

10. Maybe a silly point but one you are able to archieve in every side of view. Make it the best year 2017 in your life. We humans doesn't have a timemachine, so it's possible. 

I wish everybody a wonderful remaining year 2017!